Posts Tagged ‘New York Times’

The Parenting Thing: Dads Just Do It Differently

Saturday, November 7th, 2009


OK mom, be honest. Have you ever pushed your partner aside because he didn’t diaper the baby exactly the right way, didn’t make the eggs the way your daughter likes them, didn’t follow the bedtime routine to the letter?

And then did you complain because Dad retreated to the den with the TV remote and didn’t participate with the kids the way you think he should?

According to an article in the New York Times this week, “uninvolved fathers have long been accused of lacking motivation. But research shows that… even as more fathers are changing diapers, dropping the children off at school and coaching soccer, they are often pushed aside in ways large and small.”

It’s easy to disagree on discipline, TV limits — even how to change a diaper. That’s why it’s so important for parents to talk, and for moms to perhaps loosen the reins just a bit and realize that Dad may parent a little differently, but that it’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Check out the article and let me know what you think. (This means you, too, dads!)

When Would YOU Call The Police?

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2009

Terrific piece in the New York Times today — "When Do You Call The Police?" by Lisa Belkin.

"You’ve seen it too often on the news — a child is found (sometimes too
late) in an abusive home," writes Belkin. "A baby dies in a hot car. A teen shoots up a
school, and it turns out he was ignored or mistreated by his parents.
You wonder — didn’t anyone notice? And why didn’t they say anything?"

ABC’s new show What Would You Do? sets up such situations and watches as average people decide whether to get involved or mind their own business.

When DO you call the police? Speak with a teenager's parents? Notify the school guidance counselor? When are you possibly overreacting and when might you be ignoring a potentially dangerous situation?

As parents, these are tough calls to make — especially when it's tempting to just mind our own business and not risk angering a neighbor, a parent from school, one of our kid's friends…

Would would you do?

So Your Kid Won’t “Friend” You on Facebook?

Friday, October 17th, 2008

Facebook, Inc.

Thanks to writer Liz Seegert (who is also the mom of a teenage son) for telling me about a terrific article by Lisa Belkin in The New York Times Magazine: "When Your Kid Won't 'Friend' You."

Belkin talks about joining a Facebook group called “Moms of Kids Who are Embarrassed They Have a Facebook.” Apparently its ranks are growing quickly.

How old should a kid be before joining Facebook or another social-media site? Is it strictly his business what he does there — or are you, as a parent, obligated to see what's on his page and to make sure he's making good decisions, not giving out too much personal information, not posting something that might hurt his chances of getting a job after college, etc? (Man, life used to be so much simpler, didn't it?)

I had no idea how wide-ranging the opinions are on this topic until I started reading the comment after Belkin's piece. Let's just say there's no clear agreement here. But reading others' thoughts on the subject might help you look at all the issues and decide what's right for your kid.

And, really, with all the craziness surrounding kids and Facebook, MySpace, YouTube and Who-Knows-What-Will-Be-Invented-Tomorrow, that's all we can do, right? Look at all sides of the issue, try to put pressure (from our kids, their peers, other parents, the media) aside and decide what's best for our family.

Hey, nobody ever said this parenting thing would be easy.