Posts Tagged ‘drinking’

Are You Becoming a Helicopter Parent?

Wednesday, July 29th, 2009

Last August I wrote here about helicopter parents and how so many of us don't seem to know when to back off and let our kids learn about the world and take a few lumps.

Frankly, I'm getting tired of hearing about kids who get in trouble at school and instead of also getting in trouble at home because they got in trouble at school (my own parents' approach — which seemed to work), their parents are busy marching down to the principal's office with their attorney.

Are there times when the school might get it wrong? Of course. Do we need to be supportive parents? Definitely. But doesn't it seem as if this pendulum has been swinging WAY too far in one direction for the past decade?

What are these parents so afraid of? That their kid won't get into Harvard because he doesn't have a perfect record? It seems like, for too many parents these days, if their kid is caught cheating in school, doing drugs on campus, repeatedly dressing like a hooker or drinking in the restroom, their first thought is to put up that umbrella, to pave the way to "success," to hover and to do everything but teach their child to be responsible for his or her actions.

I know of one high school that has completely given up on having a dress code because too many parents were up in arms about their kids' right to "express themselves." Some threatened legal action. (I kid you not.) So now they have 15-year-old girls running around in sexy cropped shirts with the top of their thongs hanging out, ready to be snapped by 15-year-old boys. On campus. In English class.


Behavior has consequences out in the real world. Parents can't justify every action and smooth a kid's way in life forever, nor should they. If they try to, how does that lead to healthy, well-adjusted young adults?