In a recent blog post for “Adoption Stories,” her blog on psychologytoday.com, journalist, blogger and licensed social worker Meredith Resnick has hit the nail on the head in describing the early (and sometimes not-so-early) days of parenthood.
She talks about “missing the freedom of life just being about me and my husband.” Something he said “helped me see that now more than ever — when it felt like there was no time because of the kids — that he and I needed to carve out time for ourselves individually, and for our relationship, together.”
Resnick’s interview with Alisa Bowman, creator of Project: Happily Ever After, quickly gets to the heart of what many parents feel during that adjustment period. It’s possible to have “me time” and “couple time” and still be a good parent, Bowman says. “When you put yourself last, though, that’s a recipe for burnout, poor parenting, and marital problems,” she adds. “You keep allowing yourself to get used up and used up some more, until all that is left of you is an exhausted, out of shape, cranky shadow of your former self.”
I loved this interview, and I can’t wait to read Bowman’s upcoming book, Project: Happily Ever After, her story of how she went from wishing her husband dead to renewing her wedding vows.
Both Resnick and Bowman are brave writers who know how to get very personal. In the process, they help readers relate to their own lives — even the lives sometimes lived in tears behind closed bedroom doors. Visit their blogs and I think you’ll be hooked, too. Then call the babysitter and make a dinner reservation just for the two of you — no kids’ meals, diaper bags or talk of preschool allowed.