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	<title>Parent Talk Today &#187; retainers</title>
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	<description>Because we&#039;re all in this together</description>
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		<title>Who&#8217;s In Charge Here?</title>
		<link>http://www.parenttalktoday.com/2010/02/04/whos-in-charge-here-2/</link>
		<comments>http://www.parenttalktoday.com/2010/02/04/whos-in-charge-here-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 05 Feb 2010 02:03:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Kathy</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Essays]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[My Not-So-Humble Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rants]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dental braces]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kids and Teens]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Orthodontics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[retainers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.parenttalktoday.com/?p=1252</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I was talking with a friend who works in an orthodontist&#8217;s office recently, and the subject of retainers came up. I mentioned that Matt, my son, will get nagged to wear his retainers, which we picked up today. And then I said &#8220;but you probably hear that from all the parents, right?&#8221; &#8220;You&#8217;d be surprised,&#8221; [...]


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<dl class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px;">
<dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a href="http://commons.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:ClockFace_Retainers.jpg"><img title="Top and bottom retainers" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/d1/ClockFace_Retainers.jpg/300px-ClockFace_Retainers.jpg" alt="Top and bottom retainers" width="241" height="130" /></a></dt>
<dd class="wp-caption-dd zemanta-img-attribution" style="font-size: 0.8em;"><a href="http://commons.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:ClockFace_Retainers.jpg"></a></dd>
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<p>I was talking with a friend who works in an orthodontist&#8217;s office recently, and the subject of retainers came up. I mentioned that Matt, my son, will get nagged to wear his retainers, which we picked up today. And then I said &#8220;but you probably hear that from all the parents, right?&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;You&#8217;d be surprised,&#8221; she said, and she went on to describe moms who say things like &#8220;Well, I can&#8217;t make her wear it. It&#8217;s her mouth.&#8221;</p>
<p>(Insert screeching-tire sound here.)</p>
<p>Wait a minute. Who&#8217;s the mom? Who&#8217;s the kid? Who is paying for those braces, that roof over the kid&#8217;s head, etc.? Who is supposed to be the mature adult who knows more and who is in charge of making good decisions for the sake of this kid&#8217;s health and future?</p>
<p>Do I sound a little fed up? Good.</p>
<p>I see so much of this in my community, and I can only assume that the &#8220;kids-in-charge&#8221; trend is spreading across the land:</p>
<p>&#8220;My kid will only eat fast food.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;My three kids like three different things, so I have to make three different meals at dinner.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;My kid won&#8217;t go to bed on time. I explain to her that she needs sleep, but she just won&#8217;t.&#8221;</p>
<p>Seriously?</p>
<p>Your kid has enough friends. He doesn&#8217;t need you to be his buddy — despite how much you don&#8217;t want him to be mad at you for acting like a parent. He doesn&#8217;t need you to never frustrate him. To tip-toe around and make three dinners every night and pay the ortho bill while that retainer sits on the bathroom counter.</p>
<p>He needs a parent. Be one. He&#8217;ll fuss and fight and complain. But secretly? He&#8217;ll be glad that you care enough to be the adult, the person who helps set him on the right path in life.</p>
<p>And when he looks in the mirror when he&#8217;s 25? He might even see straight teeth.</p>
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