Parent Talk Today

Busy Parent? Sure! But Don't Forget Your Valuables

It started off with a rash of smash-and-grab thefts from parked cars near my son's school. Then I started paying more attention to the local crime reports in the newspaper. Here are some recent reports. Do you see a trend?

°    The victim parked and locked her vehicle on the street and set the alarm. When she returned to the vehicle she saw that the driver’s side window had been smashed out and the GPS system which had been attached to the lower windshield was missing. No suspects were seen or heard.

°    The victim parked and locked his vehicle in his driveway and returned to find unknown suspect(s) had smashed the driver’s side rear window. Suspect(s) took an iPod, charger and a camera that had been left in plain sight.

°    Three separate vehicles that were left unlocked and parked on the street were broken into by unknown suspect(s). Items taken included a GPS system and a camera.

I've talked with moms at my son's school who routinely leave their purse on the car set "because I'm just going to be gone for a few minutes to pick up my son." Or they leave their GPS unit out in plain sight because it's a pain to take it with them or hide it from view. But these are crimes of opportunity, and we can't be so busy with our kids that we forget to grab our purse, camera, laptop, iPod.

Now's the time to set a good example, as well, so that when our kids become teens and start driving, they won't come crying to us when their purse, wallet or camera are stolen from the car. It only takes a minute to secure these items. (And you'll be helping to lower everyone's insurance bills. Thanks.)

If Your Kid Loses His Wallet...

In addition to a driver's license, teens today carry many of the same things adults carry in their wallets: credit cards, debit cards and other items that shouldn't fall into the wrong hands. Like their parents, teens need to know what to do if their wallet or purse is lost or stolen — and they need to act quickly if it does go missing.

A lost or stolen wallet or purse is a gold mine of information to identity thieves. If your wallet or purse is missing, follow these guidelines from the U.S. Federal Trade Commission:

• Cancel your credit, debit and ATM cards immediately.
• Get new cards with new account numbers.
• Call the fraud departments of the major credit reporting agencies.
• Ask each agency to put out a fraud alert on your accounts.
• Report the loss to the fraud department at your bank.
• Review your credit reports regularly and have them corrected when necessary.
• Report a missing driver’s license to your state’s department of motor vehicles.
• If your keys are missing, change the locks on your home and car.
• File a report with the police department and keep a copy.
  

Something we've done at our house to make things a bit easier if we lose a wallet: copy the contents of the wallet on a copier — both front and back of each card. That way we won't forget what we had in the wallet in the event of a theft. Makes it easier to (ugh) make those phone calls to banks, etc.

Just Found Your Cell Phone in the Washing Machine? Maybe This Should Be Your Next Model

Of all the Google searches that have brought readers to Parent Talk Today, the most common, by far, is "cell phone in the washing machine," which continues to bring readers to my post about the day my son's phone was found, soaking wet, at the bottom of the washer. (Nope. Couldn't save it.)

Leaving the phone in a pants pocket and discovering it after hearing the "clank, clank" sound of it bouncing around the dryer seems to be a universal problem. And when you have kids, you know they seldom remember to check their pockets before tossing laundry in the basket.

Etan Horowitz, a reporter and columnist at the Orlando Sentinel, decided to check out a phone that claims to be tough enough to handle both water and quite a bit of abuse. It's the G'zOne Boulder, a new phone from Verizon Wireless ($130 with a two-year contract).

Horowitz seemed to have a pretty good time dropping the phone into water (it rang, when he called it, while it was underwater), dropping it onto concrete from seven feet up and then running it through the washer and dryer. He even dropped it into the (ugh) toilet, fished it out and dried it off. (The things dedicated journalists will do for a story!) Read his article here.

Saying No to Kids in a Yes Culture

A terrific writing buddy of mine, Kathy Seal, has an article in Scouting magazine this month that I think is a must-read. (And hey, I'm quoted in it. Bonus!)

Here's an excerpt from "Saying No to Children in a Yes Culture":

One day Jen Singer’s sons, 11-year-old Nicholas and 9-year-old Christopher, started fighting in the car on the way to their piano lessons. The boys, both Cub Scouts, knew their Mom would buy them pizza before the lesson only if they got along. So Singer pulled her car to the side of the road, turned off the motor, and told them, “No pizza today, guys.”

“But Mom, but Mom!” the boys cried.

“Sorry boys, that’s it,” she told them. “When you can stop fighting, I’ll start driving again.”

“You have to say no now and then,” Singer explains, “or they’ll grow up thinking everything will go their way. But it won’t.” 

Seal goes on to note that psychologist David Walsh says if parents can learn to say “no” at appropriate times, they’ll teach their children how to delay gratification, a key skill for success in school and in life.

Check out this excellent article. And let us know, in comments, how you handle saying no with your kids.

Subscribe to Parent Talk Today with RSS: It's Easy!

Bless the good folks over at SimpleMom.net. They have written the most easy-to-understand info I've ever seen on subscribing to blogs: "Subscribing to Blogs 101: The Why, the How & the Where."

Several of my subscribers have e-mailed recently to say they are having trouble getting the Feedblitz update for Parent Talk Today via e-mail. I'm not not sure what's going on with Feedblitz, but I can definitely recommend subscribing in a reader, instead. Just click on the orange button in the left sidebar to get started. (After you do that, just unsubscribe to the e-mails at the bottom of any Feedblitz e-mail.)

I subscribe to SimpleMom and I love it. Their great tips and beautiful photos (such as this one, by Tony Triolo, which they used to illustrate the post) bring me back often. Be sure to check them out. (That photo, by the way, reminds me of Taos, New Mexico, one of my favorite places.)

And make sure you scroll all the way down through their post on subscribing, because there's a terrific video there that explains subscribing to RSS feeds and using a reader. It's simple, really.

OK, folks — when I start getting notified that a bunch of you are dropping my feed on Feedblitz, I won't be offended. I'll know you jumped on the RSS bandwagon!

10 Ways to Prevent Summer Brain Drain

Kids vegging out in front of the tube too much this summer? Head on over to Montana Parent's terrific website and check out my new article, "10 Ways to Prevent Brain Drain," for expert tips on keeping your kids' brains engaged during these lazy days. (They'll have so much fun, they won't even realize their synapses are popping, I promise.) Here's a sample:

• Learn cool science tricks with the Surfing Scientist. At www.abc.net.au/science/surfingscientist/tricks.htm, Australian physics instructor (and surfer) Ruben Meerman shows kids how to amaze their friends by lifting a marble off a table by touching it only with a glass, making an ice cube necklace, turning an empty soft drink can into a twirling ballerina and much more. (Younger kids will need assistance.)

 • Have fun with grocery-store math. Visit http://printables4kids.com/grocery-cart-math to turn a trip to the grocery store into a fun learning experience. Before you head to the store, ask the kids to use the printable worksheet to estimate prices for items on your list. Once there, have your kids check out the actual price for each item. Then get those math skills working as they calculate the difference between the estimated price and the real price. (And talk about a great way to teach kids the importance of family budgeting. With the price of groceries these days, you’d think Lucky Charms would come with a real pot of gold!)

• Take younger kids to the post office. Talk with your child about “snail mail” and how it’s different from e-mail. Tell her about the Pony Express (visit the Pony Express National Museum website at www.ponyexpress.org) and the different ways mail is delivered today — by plane, train, boat, etc., suggests Don Schilling, editor of The Stamp Collecting Round Up (www.stampcollectingroundup.blogspot.com). “Let your child pick out some stamps she thinks are interesting. When you get home, write a letter together and use one of the stamps your child selected,” Schilling adds. Talk with your child about starting a stamp collection.

Want more? Click here.

Parents Need Naps, Too!

The Boston Glob ran a terrific article recently on "How to Nap." My first thought, when I saw it, was "Come on. Who doesn't know how to nap?" But as I learned, there's a lot to know.

Are you a lark or an owl? When you go to bed and get up determines your optimal time for napping. The length of your nap determines whether you awake refreshed or groggy. (So set a timer.) And be sure to check out the great tips for "the perfect siesta," including suggestions for how to quiet your mind, calm your body and create the right environment for snoozing.

Whether you're at the "nap while the baby naps" stage (Forget the laundry and dishes!) or you're the slightly stressed mother of teens, a nap will do you a world of good.

Now I just need to stop blogging for 20 minutes and go take my own advice...

Setting Healthy Limits

In today’s world, it’s easy for parents to feel competitive and to think they need to parent their children the way “everybody’s doing it,” says family therapist and educator Michael Gurian, author of Nurture The Nature: Understanding and Supporting Your Child’s Unique Core Personality (Jossey-Bass; 2007; $24.95).

But it’s important to understand your child as an individual and to set healthy limits that work for your family, he says. I asked Gurian’s advice on some of today’s common parenting challenges.

Q:    My 3-year-old daughter screams if I don’t buy her candy at the grocery store. How can I get her to stop?

A:    We need to recognize that kids want limits. Before you enter the store, let your child know whether she will be allowed to choose a treat. If it’s a “no-treat day,” and she starts to scream, pick her up, take her to the car and sit with her for a minute or two until she calms down. Then go back to the store. If she starts screaming again, repeat the trip to the car. When we are consistent with how we respond, our children quickly learn that we mean what we say. This helps them learn self-control and feel secure.

Q:     My 5-year-old son hits me when he’s mad. What should I do?

A:    Starting at a young age, children can be taught to understand a simple family rule: “We do not hit animate objects.” That includes pets as well as people. But we all get angry, and it’s OK to express that anger appropriately. Boys, especially, may feel physical and may not be as able to verbalize their feelings as well as girls can at a young age. So they need an outlet. Encourage kids to express their anger by hitting a pillow, whacking the back of the couch with a foam-filled Bataca bat or going outside and shooting hoops. Often it’s easier for them to calmly discuss their feelings after having that physical release.

Q:    Sibling rivalry between my pre-teen daughters is driving me crazy. What can I do?

A:    Of course, we need to draw the line at dangerous or truly hurtful behavior. But often it’s best to let kids work this out on their own. (And it’s OK to tell them to leave the room when they drive you nuts!) Sibling rivalry helps kids learn to deal with the world. It teaches them about themselves and it helps them learn to work with others and solve problems — all skills that will help them later in life.

Q:    My 9-year-old son would play video games day and night if I let him. Where should I draw the line?

A:    Boys’ brains are wired to love competition and to be attracted to objects moving through space. Video games excite the reward center in the brain so much that kids may be unmotivated to do other tasks. It’s up to us to set limits, and the appropriate amount of time depends on the child. How is he functioning in the world? Does he play outside? Does he do well in school? Does he have friends? We need to make sure our kids are developing their bodies and brains in a balanced way.

Gas Prices Got You Down? Vacation at Home

Wondering how high airline ticket prices will go as you're planning that family vacation? Thinking that a driving trip will break the bank?

There's another option. Check out my article, "Vacationing at Home," over at littlerockfamily.com. You'll find lots of tips for making family memories right in your own backyard. (And I promise, this doesn't involve mom doing any dishes! I mean, there are limits, right?)

Of course, vacationing at home still means VACATIONING. I highly recommend going out for yummy breakfasts at every opportunity... And for the price of a tank of gas these days, you can buy a lot of banana pancakes with whipped cream!

Jessica Alba's Pregnancy Style

The folks over at SporkFashion.com scored a fun interview recently. They talked with Jessica Alba about how pregnancy changed her style.  Check out the interview here.

I have to admit that, looking at her, I don't feel all that stylish when I think back to my own maternity clothes. But I love how she talks about taking her skinny jeans (and these are skinny jeans; scroll down on the Spork blog page to see them) and turning them into maternity jeans. She also takes a mini dress and wears it as a top.

While we non-celebrity moms may not be wearing all the latest designer-label ($$$) maternity clothes, we can steal some great tips from this mom-to-be who always looks fabulous. (And I love that Alba mentions that her shoes no longer fit! Boy, can we all relate to that or what?)