Parent Talk Today

Check Out These Fabulous Parenting Blogs

You gotta love any day when someone says your blog is "fabulous!" And when the honor comes from the terrific Tessa Falk over at Pardon Our Poo, it's even more of a kick. (That is one of the funniest, and best-looking, parenting blogs around. Check it out.) Thanks for the award, Tessa!

The deal with the "Your Blog is Fabulous" award is that you get to pass it on. Here are the rules:

1. You have to pass it on to 5 other fabulous blogs in a post.
2. You have to list 5 of your fabulous addictions in the post.
3. You must copy and paste the rules and the instructions below in the post.

Instructions:
1. On your post about receiving this award, make sure you include the person that gave you the award and link it back to them.
2. When you post your five winners, make sure you link to them as well.
3. To add the award to your post, simply right-click, save image, then "add image" in your post as a picture so your winners can save it.
4. Don't forget to let your winners know they won an award from you by emailing them or leaving a comment on their blog.

Here are my addictions and a list of blogs that rock!

My Five Fabulous Addictions:

1. My guys, Randy (hubby) and Matt (our almost teenager — yikes). They keep me busy, happy and feeling loved. 

2. Saving memories in fun ways. I love anything to do with taking pictures, video (with my new Flip camera -- I'm lovin' the Flip!), scrapbooking, photo cards... you name it. (Send me some cool ideas!)

3. Chocolate. Dark chocolate. Frozen, melted... There is very little you can do to dark chocolate that will keep me from eating it. Want to perk up a batch of brownies? Throw in half a bag of semi sweet chocolate chips. Voila: You're a gourmet baker in the hearts and minds of all who scarf down your treats.

4. The Daily Show. I'm hooked. (Hey, is Jon Stewart adorable — and hysterical — or what?)

5. Girlfriend time. Meeting for breakfast, lunch or coffee. Chick flicks-and-wine evenings. Funny e-mails and chatting. I love my gal pals! Can't imagine going through life without them, and I treasure them more each year.

I pass this award on to my 5 Fabulous Blog Buddies:

1. Maria Bailey and Lynn Armitage at My Teen, The Alien

2. Chris Brogan at Dad-o-Matic

3. Paula Spencer at Momfidence!

5. Fred Goodall at Mocha Dad

4. Leah Ingram at The Lean, Green Family

Of course, there are more faves of mine that I couldn't list here. Just check out my blogroll on the right sidebar and give 'em a visit!

Guest Post: A Deaf Mom Shares Her World

I'm excited to introduce guest blogger Karen Putz, the author of a terrific blog, A Deaf Mom Shares Her World. This piece was originally published in the Hands and Voices Communicator.

I grew up in a family with five generations of hearing loss. My great-grandmother, grandmother, my mom and all of her siblings were deaf or hard of hearing and none of them knew sign language. All of my siblings have hearing loss as well as my children and one niece.

My mother’s hearing began to decline in her twenties. All of my brothers and sisters were born hearing and one by one, we each lost our hearing. My oldest sister was three years old when she fell, hit her head and instantly became profoundly deaf. My parents sent her off to live with my aunt and she attended Central Institute for the Deaf, an oral school.

My brother Dennis was 36 years old when a wooden beam fell on him at work and he woke up in the hospital two days later with a severe hearing loss. My sister Jeanie began to lose hearing in her 20’s and just last summer, she slipped on a rug and became profoundly deaf. My brother Kenny has just recently began to wear hearing aids for a mild loss.

I came along 10 years after the last sibling was born. When I was five, I was diagnosed with a moderate to severe hearing loss. I muddled along in school, receiving a hearing aid in 4th grade and speech therapy. Because I “functioned” so well and was able to keep up my grades, I was pretty much lost in the system. Teachers lavished praise on the “girl with the hearing loss.” My loneliness was often overlooked.

My life stayed this way all through my school years. I made friends with a select few who could look beyond my hearing loss. In high school, I met another girl, Shawn, who also wore hearing aids and we became fast friends. We each shared the horror of dealing with group situations and the anxiety that came with it. We learned to adapt so well that some of our friends had no clue that we wore hearing aids. Of course, we missed out on the punch lines of many jokes while laughing along with the others.

When I began attending classes at the local community college, I started to fear that I had no future ahead of me. I had interviewed for several jobs, but no one had the courage to hire me or deal with my inability to use the phone. I took one job as a dishwasher at a local restaurant and earned money mostly by babysitting. The future began to look pretty bleak. The few guys that I dated weren’t good marriage prospects. I began to wonder just where I was headed.

On a whim, I decided to transfer to a college that had a program for deaf and hard-of-hearing persons. My mother reluctantly supported my decision. She was afraid to see her last baby go off to the great unknown. How in the world would I cope at a university when I could barely get by at the community college?

Just before going off to college, I was water skiing on my bare feet and I turned to cross the wake. I fell hard, and for the next few days, I kept feeling like I had water in my ear. I had become profoundly deaf.

Going off to college turned out to be a blessing. At first, it was quite a culture shock. I was living on a co-ed floor with people who signed so fast that it was intimidating. Little by little, I was transformed. Slowly, I was introduced to a Deaf life to the point it felt like “coming home.” I was in a world where hearing didn’t matter. It was a world where, if I missed the punch line of a joke, someone would kindly sign it over again until I could join in the laughter. Of course, occasionally I encountered: “Sorry, train gone!”

My mother and siblings began to see a new person blossom in front of them. I introduced them to a TTY, and a new, accessible world began to open for them. My mom admitted that she wished she had known more about sign language while we were growing up so that we could have had access to interpreters.

When my oldest son became deaf, my mom began to ask how to sign certain things. It made me smile to see my 70-year old mom signing to my kids. One of her favorite signs was the sign for “I love you,” which is made with the thumb, forefinger and pinky finger extended and the two middle fingers bent downward.

Every time we got into the van to leave to go home, Mom would flash her “I love you” sign. There was only one problem though…

Mom would occasionally forget and leave the thumb bent inward, which turned the sign into “B.S.”

It is quite a picture to see Mom flashing her “B.S.” sign when we are pulling out of the driveway. It always puts a smile on my face.

It’s no B.S., Mom. I love you too!

 

Check Out My Guest Post at The Simple Marriage Project

I'm excited to be invited to share a guest post over at The Simple Marriage Project today. This blog offers so many inspirational ideas for making marriage better — and a lot more fun.

I haven't yet tried the "21-Day Complaint-Free Marriage Experiment," because, really now, how long would I last? I'm guessing I'd catch myself in a whine of some sort by mid-afternoon on day one.

But maybe that's the point of the experiment: To make myself more mindful of my attitudes and my words. If I give it a shot, I'll let you know. And if you try the experiment yourself, let us know over here how it's going.

And please drop by and check out my guest post, too! Thanks, Corey, for the kind invitation.

Are You Taking The Bait?

Today we're featuring a terrific guest post from family therapist Corey Allan, Ph.D. who blogs over at The Simple Marriage Project. Corey and his wife, who celebrated their 15th anniversary this month, have a 3-year-old daughter and a 1-year-old son. (And a cool dog named Otis — see below.) Thanks for sharing this with us, Corey!

Spend any time with a parent, and you are bound to hear tales of his or her children's escapades. Stories about when they said the most inappropriate thing at the most inopportune time, when they continue to test the boundaries and rules, or when they've thrown a tantrum at Target. It's enough to drive almost anyone crazy. Take comfort in knowing that you're not alone.

Parents worldwide have gone through or are currently in the midst of the storm as well. Take advantage of the times when you can swap stories with other parents in the trenches. It can be hilarious, enlightening — and you may walk away from the conversation thankful for your children's "tame" behavior.

Have you ever stopped to contemplate your role in your child's behaviors? Could it be that they feed off you? I believe the answer is yes.

Applying this thought to parenting is the way to begin to gain control over your child's behaviors. And the most effective way to do this is to get a better handle on your own emotional reactivity.

Let me explain. You come in after a long day and your child is in a bad mood due to a run-in he had with his teacher at school. You are already predisposed to reacting badly to any negative behaviors due to your tough day, and your child decides this is the best time to inform you that he did not do any of the chores you assigned him for the week. He even goes so far as to add a few colorful descriptions to his replies.

Do you take the bait and jump all over his disrespectful attitude? If you do, you've allowed him to change the topic of conversation, which was his incomplete chores. It's easy to react when our buttons get pushed, but it is also the way they kids the subject. And they only get more expert at this skill as they grow older.

When it comes to arguments with another person, especially children and teenagers, the rule is this: Whoever controls the mood and the direction of the argument will win the argument.

My belief is that if, as a parent, you get into an argument with your child, they've already won. While they may not have changed the responsibility or the consequence, the fact that you had to argue about it keeps the "power" in their court. They controlled you by pushing your emotional buttons. When our emotions get the best of us in conversations, most people either over-react or shut down completely — leaving a possible wake of damage behind.

To take charge of your child's behaviors, learn to react less emotionally to their instigations. It will change the dynamic between you and leave them wondering what to do next. After you have learned to react less, you are then more capable of creating an appropriate consequence for the behavior.

As a parent, you're not raising puppies. You don't have to catch your child in the act. Take some time to contemplate an appropriate consequence. Confer with your spouse. Search the Internet. Then get back with your child and calmly inform them of the consequences of their actions.

Do this consistently and over time, you will be in charge of the playing field in which your children reside. There will also be far less damage repair needed after the emotional upheavals.

Incidentally, the principles of being less emotionally reactive work with spouses as well.

So Your Kid Was Rejected By Her #1 College Pick? Have Her Read This

Today I'm happy to welcome Rob Gilbert, Ph.D., professor of sport psychology at Montclair State University in Montclair, New Jersey, as a guest blogger. I love his perspective on college life, and I plan to save this post to share with my own son when he gets a bit closer to college age.

Dr. Gilbert is the author of How to Have Fun Without Failing Out: 430 Tips from a College Professor. And his blog offers great motivational tips for students. (Yes, he's a busy guy!) Thanks for joining us today, Dr. Gilbert!

REJECTED? I CAN HELP!

You got the dreaded thin letter and found that the college you desperately wanted doesn’t want you.

Of course, you’re devastated—look at all the time, effort, and money you and your parents put into the whole college application process with guidance counselors, private college consultants, tutors, test-prep courses, college visits, interviews, essays, SATs, etc.

It’s not true that all your hopes and dreams are now destroyed. Your future is not over. Once I saw a poster that read, “It’s not the end of the road; it’s just a bend in the road!”

I’m not going to give you some Pollyanna-type pep talk and tell you not to worry. What I’m going to tell you is that wallowing in your misery is not the answer. You must regroup and refocus — starting right now!

Maybe I can help. I speak from over 40 years of experience. I’ve been on a college campus since 1964 — first as a student, then as a staff member, and for the last 29 years as a professor at Montclair State University.

However there’s one big mystery about college I’ve never been able to solve.

Why are students putting so much time, effort, and energy into finding their so-called “right” college, and so little time, effort, and energy into figuring out what their personal passion is once they’re in college? I see students devoting more time to determining where they’re going to spend the next four or five years of their college lives rather than concentrating on how they’re going to spend the next 40 to 50 years of their professional lives — in their careers.

And here’s a warning if you did get into the college of your dreams: Be careful of the “Yale Syndrome.”  Donald Archer, an expert in higher education and the author of “Cool Colleges,” reports that some students are so obsessively focused on receiving the “fat envelope” that getting admitted becomes an end in itself. Remember: Gaining admissions is not the end of the adventure — it’s the beginning!

The late psychiatrist and radio talk-show host Dr. David Viscott once said, “The purpose of life is to discover your gifts. The meaning of life comes from giving your gifts away.”The purpose of college is to find your gifts, to find your passion, to find your life’s work.

Right now stop regretting why you didn’t get into that school that was “perfect” for you and start refocusing on the future. Whatever college or university you’ll be attending in September, you can have a spectacular, life-changing experience there. There’s mounting research that shows that your future success is not determined by the college you attend.

However, no professor, advisor, or classmate is going to show you how to follow the yellow brick road to your passion. Sure, you’ll receive a lot of help, but it’s primarily a do-it-yourself job.

Where you attend college is not nearly as important as what you’re going to do once you get there. Here’s some advice for when you arrive on campus in September that’ll help you find your passion:

#1. Find out who the most passionate professors on campus are and enroll in their courses —regardless of what they teach or when the classes meet. I joke with my students that most of them probably would not take Religion 101 if it met at 8:00 a.m. even if it were taught by Professor J. Christ!

#2. The noted mythologist Joseph Campbell said, “Follow your bliss.” What are the subjects or activities that you find endlessly interesting? What are the things you like to do that energize you? Be a detective. Listen to your heart. Find what you love.

#3. Professor Joseph Renzuli from the University of Connecticut advises students to carefully examine what they loved to do as a child because this might give some insight into what they might really want to do for a career. Did you know that when they were kids, Sesame Street’s Jim Henson loved to play with puppets and Walt Disney loved to draw?

Of all the things you can discover in college, the most important is your passion.

Look at it this way: College is a fountain of knowledge. Some students come to drink. More come to sip. But most come just to gargle. Make sure you take a big gulp!

Can Being a Parent Help You In Business, Too?

Today I'm happy to welcome guest blogger Adrian Miller, president of Adrian Miller Sales Training in Port Washington, New York. The proud mom of 23-year-old Eric (left) and 20-year-old Nick (in the green shirt, below), Miller has had just enough time away from the everyday parenting world to have gained a little perspective that the rest of us (who are still in the trenches) can benefit from. Here's her post on "How Being a Mom Has Helped Me In Business." Thanks, Adrian!

For most women, becoming a mother is a turning point in their life. It's a time that's rife with challenges, frustrations, and uncertainties, but it's also when many of life's most rewarding achievements and miraculous moments occur. What many new moms figure out rather quickly is that the skills that they use every day while taking care of children are also very applicable in succeeding in business. Nurturing a needy newborn isn't all that different from managing a high-maintenance client, and trying to juggle chores and kids can be strikingly similar to the multi-tasking required to manage a large list of prospects. Here are just a few of the skills that are fine-tuned and mastered the minute you take that leap into motherhood:

Patience. Colicky infants, whiny toddlers, defiant teenagers... If you didn't have patience before you had children, you quickly developed this virtue as a parent. And, the patience required for childcare definitely helps you increase your tolerance threshold in business. Difficult clients and prospects are plentiful, and patience is the key to unlocking their buying potential.

Time Management. As any new mother knows, time can be a scarce commodity and shouldn't be wasted frivolously. Whether you need to meet a specific deadline or only have an hour before your child wakes from a nap, time-management skills are essential to getting things done. Parenthood does wonders for enlightening women (and some men) on the need to budget time wisely, and this skill certainly gives moms a distinct competitive edge over their child-free colleagues.

Multi-tasking. If you've ever changed a diaper while on the phone making a doctor's appointment, while reading an email, you understand multi-tasking. Sure, we'd all love to be able to focus on one task at a time, but in this age of technology and information, the ability to multi-task is a necessity if you want to be competitive in the market. Motherhood promotes multi-tasking skills tremendously, and these skills remain with mothers long after the diaper changes cease.

Training Skills. One of the primary jobs of a parent is to teach your child what is needed to succeed in the world. This requires you to be a dedicated, skilled trainer. The same skills are required in business. Whether you're training a classroom of seminar attendees or guiding a client through the sales process, the training abilities you've acquired as a mother will certainly come in handy in the business world.

Flexibility. Children are full of surprises, and staying flexible is a necessity to maintain sanity. Every day is full of challenges and interruptions, and if there is one thing that is consistent about parenting, it's the fact that it's ever-changing. Inflexibility doesn't work for parents, nor does it work in business. People can be indecisive, situations can change, and even your role can evolve. Having the flexibility to gracefully manage the unexpected is a skill that will always serve you well, whether with the kids or in the office.

Join Us Friday When The "You're a Good Mom" Blog Tour Stops Here!

For 21st Century mothers, there seem to be just two choices: Live up to the Super Mom or give up to be the Slacker Mom. One's bad for you; one's bad for your kids. So what's a momma to do?

In You're a Good Mom (and Your Kids Aren't So Bad Either): The 14 Secrets to Finding Happiness Between Super Mom and Slacker Mom," the Internet's favorite momma, Jen Singer, tells all. Turns out you can raise perfectly good kids in that sweet spot between flash cards at breakfast and "donuts for dinner, kids!" You'll find great tips like these:

• Don't answer the phone when the class mom calls.
• Your kid's birthday party isn't your coming-out celebration.
• Don't treat fine restaurants like a McDonald's PlayPlace.
• You think you're a "cool mom," but they think you're a pushover.

Filled with "that happened to me, too!" stories, YOU'RE A GOOD MOM offers giggles and a pat on the back for today's moms, whether they're deep in diapers or petrified by puberty.

Join us Friday for a great Q & A with author Jen Singer as she stops by Parent Talk Today on her blog tour!

And check out this terrific You Tube video preview:

Guest Post: Let Them Be Girls!

Today I'm jazzed to share with you a guest post from Juliana LeRoy, an award-winning writer and editor at Family-Life magazine in northern California. LeRoy also blogs over at at www.mamabear.pnn.com. I love what she has to say about shopping for clothes for young girls.

It seems to me there is a massive disconnect between what people want and what we have to choose from in the marketplace. Like the ridiculous clothing choices available for girls, when everyone is so against the objectifying of them.

In 2005 Abercrombie & Fitch put out tee shirts with phrases across the front that were demeaning to girls, including, “Who needs brains when you’ve got these?” A group of girls in Pittsburgh decided to take the company to task by “girlcotting” the stores — their version of boycotting — and they made their voices heard. Abercrombie & Fitch removed the offending shirts.

Mothers Acting Up is a group that has taken “girlcotting” to another level and made it an active way to support companies that are aligned with their values. They promote companies that have fair trade
agreements, or commitments to offering a living wage. The idea is to draw attention to good things and make them more visible.

My daughter, Megan, is eight, and she is tall and slim. Her sense of style is emerging, but she mostly wears clothes that you can move in: leggings because she’s too skinny for most pants, and she’s too busy for
skirts. She doesn’t wear tees with slogans on them, unless they say something about one of the Girl Scout camps she’s gone to, or have a school mascot on them. She’s active, and she’s feminine, and loves to feel extra pretty when the occasion calls for it.

When Megan needed a dress for a father-daughter dance, I was sure I’d be able to find something cute and fun and suitable for a third grader in no time at all. We wanted it to be fancy enough for her to feel really dressed up and special, but not too fancy. You know, something girly and pretty and sweet. Not smocking and pinafores, but not Christina Aguilera, either.

I looked online for a girl’s size 7 for Megan, and in some local department stores. It was too late for the holiday dresses, and the Easter dresses weren’t in yet. What I found was slinky materials, skimpy necklines and arms, high hemlines. The dresses were miniatures of the adult sizes, with bold prints and bright colors. They were cute, but not for the ages the sizes were for. I was puzzled and frustrated. What nine year old needs to dress like Britney out on the town? What seven year old needs to show off cleavage?

The dress we finally chose was a pretty blue shiny material, which Megan loved, and it was very simple, which I loved. It was more adult than I originally wanted, but it wasn’t a complete sell-out.

Other moms I’ve talked to have run into the same trouble looking for sixth-grade or eighth-grade graduation dresses. “We had to look all over for a dress that didn’t have spaghetti straps, or no straps at all,” one mom said. “The school has a dress code, and finding something that was dressy enough without being ridiculous was hard.”

“Last year my daughter graduated from 6th grade,” says one mom. “We went to every department and dress store, Mervyns, Macy’s JC Penney, Gottschalks, Sears, Target, Wal-Mart, second-hand stores  and bridal stores. Everything was sheer, strapless, super short, tight fitting, plunging necklines and/or backless — for a 12 year old?! I don’t think I’d let my daughter wear most of these styles to prom. I think they make girls look hookers. We finally found a dress at a bridal shop, paid too much, and had to sew on straps besides. Isn’t there anybody out there that has decent dresses?”

Today’s girls and teenagers want to feel cute, and want to be fashionable. Why can’t the clothing choices be appropriate and cute? Why does everything have to be low-cut, tight, revealing or provocative? To answer that it doesn’t, two major department stores have recently introduced more modest clothing lines, aiming at the vast market of girls, teens and women who believe confidence and intelligence is sexier than any amount of skin showing: Macy’s Shade line and Nordstrom’s Modern and Modest line.

What do you think? Are the choices out there in keeping with your values and sensibilities? Are you comfortable with the styles and examples we are being sold? Why or why not? Where’s the best place to find cute dresses for young ladies?

Guest Post: His Two Dads (What Kids Are Really Learning at School)

             

I'm so jazzed to feature a guest post from Cynthia Jenkins, AKA "Sugar Mama." LOVE her stuff. Jenkins writes a monthly column, and also a blog, for Parenting Orange County magazine in Southern California. As she puts it: "Sugar Mama writes, lives and bribes her kids with sugar in Laguna Beach, California. And sometimes in Target."      

I had every intention of turning my firstborn’s first-day-of-kindergarten angst into a column filled with conflicted feelings every parent goes through. On one hand, we’ve been waiting for our energy-charged kids to be old enough to fly the coop from the moment they could crawl — just for a little respite! On the flip side, each morning they wake up and don their backpacks marks one day closer to them leaving us permanently (and perhaps with someone they meet in kindergarten, no less!).

          

What if there’s a girl in Jackson’s kindergarten homeroom who wears rainbow-colored bows and likes trains? She’ll undoubtedly steal his heart from mine faster than I can say, “my baby.”

But the moment I start feeling this empty-nest-anxiety, I find solace in the fact that there are things Jackson will learn in school that he simply can’t get from home. And I’m not talking about reading, writing and arithmetic. I’m referring to the other 3R’s: Respect for Others, Respect for his Things, and Respect for the Environment. At least, these are the three tenents my husband and I committed to the moment we became overwhelmed with all the ”shoulda’s” in parenting. (So if our kids’ questionable behavior doesn’t fall into one of these R’s, we let it slide… Unless there’s blood.)          

But it’s the respect for others component to parenting that had us stymied by the time Jackson reached school age. Because unless we rented a melting pot of a family, inclusive of color, disability and alternative lifestyle, where was he going to gain an understanding of the real world? The world we hope he’d make a better place?

Not on our homogenous street in Laguna Beach, California… “Real Life,” folks, happens at school.          

So when it came to deciding on a kindergarten for Jackson, I had concern for things other than curriculum. I wanted to see the cars in the school parking lots, the names on the class rosters, the books on the shelves. I was, perhaps, looking for a glimmer of my own elementary experience. Born and raised in San Francisco, I had male teachers with boyfriends, a valedictorian named Monifa and a bus system that was public — not yellow with black letters. Did all this make me better at my times tables? Not necessarily. But did it make me a better person?

Most definitely.          

Or at least a better parent who can diffuse a land mine of ignorance before the light turns green.

Last month, while stopped at a red light with Jackson, he asked if he could have a play date with “Evan” from pre-school.          

“Sure. Let me find out who his mom is and see I’ll see if we can work something out,” I said.

“He doesn’t have a mom,” Jackson informed me.          

“Oh.” And I was immediately endeared to poor Evan. “Well, I’ll call his dad then.”

“Which dad?” Jackson asked. “He has two.”

Aha. This play date wasn’t about Evan. Nor was there a mom who had passed — it was about a boy with two gay dads.          

“Do you have a question for me about Evan’s family, Jackson?” I asked.

“Yeah, why does he have two dads and no mom?” he inquired.          

“Well, it sounds like his dads loved each other very much and wanted a baby, so they found a way to have one,” I offered.

“So, they’re... married?” he asked.          

“Maybe,” I said. “In some places, men can marry men and women can marry women.”

“So can I marry Evan?” Jackson asked.

“Well, I think you have to be eighteen, honey,” I said. “And you have to love each other no matter what.”          
“Well I don’t think we will, then,” Jackson said. “He pushed me off the swing today.” And then the light turned green and that was that.

You see, parents do all they can at home, and teachers nurture brilliant minds every day in school — but it’s the “Evans” in the world that teach our kids compassion, bravery and tolerance. I mean, this is a boy who will know firsthand about a love that defies boundaries, that gossip is hurtful, and judgment is usually a waste of time.          

Now that’s a kid I want at my son’s lunch table.

Am I conflicted this month, with Jackson’s first day of kindergarten upon me? You bet. It really does seem like yesterday that I held him in my arms as a newborn. Or when he muttered “mommy” for the first time. But with one tiny sneaker in front of the other, I accept that his time has come to navigate his future en masse — with friends, teachers and experiences that will shape his heart and mind forever.
         
And all this, on a little yellow bus...

So I’d like to dedicate this column to Evan and his family. Because of you, my son gained an understanding of love, compassion and tolerance I could never have found in a book.

And you’re not an “other,” Evan. You’re simply like no other.

Guest Blog: Our Get-Fat-Tuesday Family Tradition

Here's a fun post from first-time guest blogger Ellen Cajka, who knows all about healthy eating (and when to not worry about it) AND raising teenagers. I love her "Get Fat Tuesday" family tradition.

Mardi Gras, otherwise known as "Fat Tuesday," was a lot of fun at our house this year. No, we didn't have a wild costume party, partake in alcohol or even "earn" multi-colored beads.

My 14-year-old daughter, Taylor, and I planned our own version of Fat Tuesday — and boy did we do it up right! We called it "Get Fat Tuesday." Taylor is giving up fast food for Lent, and I am giving up sweets. No small task! So we decided to go out with a bang.

We ordered  three different kinds of takeout: pizza, Taco Bell and El Pollo Loco. And we finished the evening off with 31 Flavors ice cream and had two scoops each. I was planning on having a hot fudge sundae, but after a piece of pizza, 3/4 of a cheese quesadilla, some Nachos Bell Grande, chicken and mashed potatoes, a sundae suddenly didn't sound all that appetizing.

We had fun planning and it certainly felt sinful enjoying all those forbidden foods. Sweets are my nemesis, and any teen would struggle to go just a week without pizza or a burger. It's going to be LONG 40 days and 40 nights.

But hey, maybe the Easter Bunny will bring me some chocolate.