Parent Talk Today

These Kids Jam!

I'd like to introduce you to three talented, terrific kids (and likely future entrepreneurs): Chase Shepherd (11), John Parducci (10) and Conor Range (10), all fifth graders at Grand View Elementary School in Manhattan Beach, California.

They weren't tough to spot. In fact, they could be heard for several blocks as they played their music during rush hour on a local street corner today — complete with a hand-made sign — and collected donations to benefit their school. The three gave credit to their music teacher, Ms. Amy Johnson, for inspiring them.

How much did they raise? After the first half hour, the take was "$10 — plus one lady gave us a Euro."

I felt inspired to feature them on Parent Talk because it was just so darned refreshing to see kids outside, making music, raising funds for a good cause and having  great time — without a TV or a video game in sight. Way to go, guys. (And you sounded good, too.)

Ms. Johnson, thanks for inspiring these kids and many others. Conor, John and Chase, thanks for making this mom's day.

Bipolar Disorder — In Kids?

Bipolar disorder in kids (also called manic-depressive illness) is a relatively new concept, says author Irene S. Levine in an excellent article, "What's Happening to My Son?" in the current issue of Readers Digest. As recently as a decade ago, she says, many experts thought the disorder was found only in adults. But in the past few years, more and more kids are being diagnosed.

Experts are finding that many adults with bipolar disorder first had symptoms as children. And this really caught my attention: Levine says an estimate in a Harvard Medical School newsletter said that about 1 in 200 youngsters is affected, though this is controversial, she notes. Some say the number is too high and that too many kids are being medicated for mood swings. Check out this important story and share your thoughts here.

P.S. The piece also includes links to a list of symptoms and info on where to find help.

"Simple" Meals? Depends on Who's Doing The Cooking

Like most moms, I'm always scrambling for simple-but-healthy meals I can throw on the table between baseball practice and homework crunch time. So at first I was jazzed to come across Mark Bittman's article, "Summer Express: 101 Simple Meals Ready in 10 Minutes or Less" while cruising around www.nytimes.com.

But, Mr. Bittman! You're making me feel pathetic. My idea of quick and simple is ground-turkey tacos. Or a jar of pasta sauce tossed in the crock pot with a couple of sliced turkey sausages. (OK, that's cheating, I guess. The sauce cooks all day and the final prep takes 10 minutes. But it takes a whopping three minutes to throw that stuff in the crock put.)

Here are some of Bittman's suggestons:

°    Put three pounds of washed mussels in a pot with half a cup of white wine, garlic cloves, basil leaves and chopped tomatoes. Steam until mussels open. Serve with bread. (To me, simple means working with what's in the cupboard, fridge and freezer, not heading off to the store to buy fresh mussels — and then wondering what to do with the ones that don't open. Pitch 'em, right?)

°    Put a few dozen washed littlenecks in a large, hot skillet with olive oil. When clams begin to open, add a tablespoon or two of chopped garlic. When most or all are opened, add parsley. Serve alone, with bread or over angel-hair pasta. (I'm seeing a trend here. More "openings" to worry about. And more fresh stuff to buy at the last minute...)

°    Boil a lobster. Serve with lemon or melted butter. (OK, now I'm picturing that great scene from "Annie Hall." I'm Woody Allen.)

And my personal favorite...

°    Sauté squid rings and tentacles in olive oil with salt and pepper. Make a sauce of minced garlic, smoked pimentón, mayo, lots of lemon juice and fresh parsley. Serve with a chopped salad of cucumber, tomato, lettuce, grated carrot and scallion, lightly dressed.

Sigh. Scrambled eggs and hash browns, anyone?

Gotta Have My Mom Friends!

I wish I could run out for coffee with my friend Irene Levine this week, in honor of National Women's Friendship Day. But we live a couple thousand miles apart. So instead I'll share her wonderful blog on women's friendships with you.

I know I always feel more energized and just plain happier when I've had a chance to hang out with a girlfriend for an hour or two. My buddy Robi and I live an hour or so apart, but we meet in the middle every few months, where we just happen to both have some doctors, and we plan trips to the Cheesecake Factory around pap-smear and mammogram appointments. (That way, when I'm there with my feet in the stirrups or I'm waiting to get my boobs squished, I can at least look forward to seeing Robi —and stuffing my face — afterward!)

Tomorrow, I'm meeting my buddy Ellen for hot cocoa and a visit after I drop Matthew off at school. And I know I'll be chatting with my friend Mickie soon about all the ups and downs of our kids' first year at middle school. I met Judith and Therese (in the photo) back when our kids were in diapers. In fact, Judith was the first mom I met when Matt and I first ventured out of the house for a mommy-baby exercise class. (I had a diaper-blow-out emergency in class, she came to my rescue with tons of wipes and a great sense of humor — and the rest is history.)

Family, too, can also fill the friendship bill. I hit the jackpot when I married Randy and got Joy as a sister-in-law. She's one of my best friends and if I wasn't related to her I would just have to find another way to have her in my life!

Here are some of Irene's wonderful tips for celebrating our female friendships:

• Send e-cards to five female friends you haven’t spoken to in a month.
• Using email or snail mail, send a photo and short note to a faraway friend.
• Make plans to cruise TJ Maxx with a friend.
• Go see a movie or make reservations for dinner with a friend.
• Send flowers to your mother, sister or other relative who has also been a good friend to you.
• Make plans with a good friend to volunteer at a women's shelter, soup kitchen or child advocacy program.
• Make a new friend! It's easy - just smile, say hello and follow-up with coffee.
• Contribute to research on female friendships by filling out the Fractured Friendship Survey.(Note: Irene, a talented journalist, is writing a book on this subject, and this survey will provide valuable research for the book. Plus I found just the act of taking the survey to be quite thought-provoking.)

To Irene, Robi, Ellen, Joy, Mickie, Judith and Theresa... You bring joy to my life in so many ways. Thanks for being my friends!

 

I (Don't) Like "Flat Buns"

I don't know whether to praise Carl's Jr. for coming out with a teacher-free version of its "Flat Buns" commercial or to jump on the bandwagon and give them grief for producing the original ad in the first place.

As for grief, they're getting plenty of it from teachers, who were rightfully appalled at the ad, which showed a gyrating teacher dancing, stripper-style, to the rap song in front of her class, complete with pelvic thrusts. (Besides, it's such a rip off of Van Halen's "Hot for Teacher" video, they should be ashamed of their lack of originality. But that's another rant.)

When Life Feels Fragile

It has been a week filled with the kind of news that makes you realize that anything can happen to any of us, or to those we love, at any time.

°    This morning I read in the paper that the father of a boy my son, Matt, went to preschool with died yesterday in a tragic accident.

°   A 7th grade boy from Matt's middle school is in the pediatric-intensive-care ward at the hospital after being hit by a car while riding his bike home from the beach.

°    A 6th-grade girl from our church fell at home, hit her head on the family's piano and had to have neurosurgery.

How is Your Teen's Tech Etiquette?

Cell phones. Instant messaging. E-mail. Our teens (and even our pre-teens) are pretty well connected these days. And that makes it likely that they'll forget, sometimes, that it's all too easy to be quite rude or even hurtful when using one of these devices.

Writer Melanie G. Snyder tackles the subject in this month's Broward Family Life magazine, a publication for Broward County, Florida parents. (Click on the link to download the Sept. issue as a PDF file.) If you've been to a movie lately, or if you have a child who has been hurt by IM-inspired gossip, you'll agree that Snyder's message is timely — and important.

She offers a terrific article, along with some great "Tech Etiquette Sanity Tests" from Nancy Willard, author of Computer Ethics, Etiquette and Safety for the 21st Century Student:

Are You Planning — or Just Worrying?

"Let our advance worrying be our advance thinking and planning."
- Winston Churchill

I ran across this quote today and it made me think about how much time I spend — too often at 2 a. m. — worrying about something that seems like a huge task.

Take college savings, for instance. While my husband and I are saving for our son's education, we've been meaning to (for years) seriously look into 529 college savings plans. I've clipped and filed a pile of articles on the subject, but that's as far as we got.

Then there's the question of balancing retirement savings and college savings... And pretty soon it's 4 a.m. and I'm wondering if our retirement savings are in the right place!

And then the alarm clock goes off and I'm back in the world of minutia, so busy making sure the dog has been fed, the dishes have been done and my son has lunch money that I never get around to penciling in the big decisions that need to be made for our family.

So I've decided to break one this down into baby steps: